When my grandmother was raising me in Stamps, Arkansas, she had a
particular routine when people who were known to be whiners entered
her store. My grandmother would ask the customer, "How are you doing
today, Brother Thomas?"

And the person would reply, "Not so good today, Sister Henderson.
You see, it's this summer heat. I just hate it. It just frazzles me up
and frazzles me down. It's almost killing me." Then my grandmother
would stand stoically, her arms folded, and mumble, "Uh-huh, uh-huh."
And she would cut her eyes at me to make certain that I had heard the
lamentation.

As soon as the complainer was out of the store, my grandmother would
call me to stand in front of her. And then she would say the same
thing she had said at least a thousand times, it seemed to me. "Sister,
did you hear what Brother So-and-So or Sister Much-to-Do complained
about?" And I would nod. Mamma would continue, "Sister, there are
people who went to sleep all over the world last night, poor and rich
and white and black, but they will never wake again. And those dead
folks would give anything, anything at all for just five minutes of
this weather that person was grumbling about. So you watch yourself
about complaining, Sister. What you're supposed to do when you don't
like a thing is change it. If you can't change it, change the way you
think about it. Don't complain."

It is said that persons have few teachable moments in their lives.
Mamma seemed to have caught me at each one I had. Whining is not
only graceless, but can be dangerous. It can alert a brute that a victim
is in the neighborhood.

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